My First Crap Cake

*With beginner cake decorator tips!

This amazing white chocolate cake is both way out of your baking league, and delicious -assuming you are also a beginner cake decorator. Otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this unless you have such low self esteem that the only way you can survive this life is through feeding off others disastrous attempts and mishaps and just plain untalentedness. It’s ok, we all do it.

You can find the recipe for this absolutely scrumptious cake here: https://livforcake.com/white-chocolate-cake/ This site has a heeaapp of mouth watering cakes to choose from too!

As you can see from this photo, I read a beginners food photography blog prior to preparing the cake.

I told everyone I was making this heavenly white chocolate cake, an extravagant one that’s three storeys high and decorated. I invited them all to save a spot in their treat bank for it this week and await this amazing cake sensation.

**beginner cake decorating tip: Beware of ‘the slope’ look and layer by evenly distributing weight by evenly cooked cakes and evenly spread frosting

The heavenly whipped merengue frosting is full of white chocolate and a ton of butter, and so is the cake. It surprisingly still kept its light merengue texture and when it melted on the tongue my whole central nervous system goes ‘mmmm … relaaaaax….I’m hooome” while euphoric memories of warm fires, cuddles and puppy dogs flood into my mind.

This merengue frosting was to be used in between each layer of the cake, for the smooth outer layer of the cake, and then for the ultimate finish- my creative input, the intricate piped flower craft on the top of the cake. At this point I am a bit disappointed about my not so smooth finish on the outer layer, but feeling hopeful.

I also threw in a tub of caramilk cream cheese in between the first layers of the cake for the caramel lovers.

**Beginner cake decorator tip: de-crumb cake prior to applying the frosting. Also look up the term  ‘de-crumb’ in cooking methodology.

Now this next step was going to fix my uneven layer… but something just doesn’t look right. White chocolate ganache phleghmnache. Looks like a lumpy goosebumps book cover. It was just not at all what I had been dreaming about over the past week. But I’m not going to let that bum me out I thought.. I’m taking to the sky and with my fantastical imagination and I will make a masterpiece!

Well, now I’m starting to regret telling my boyfriends mum all about this new hobby … and on borrowing her Russian piping tips excitedly telling her I would send photos and bring her some.

When the Russian piping flowers didn’t work my heart sank. They came out in big blue boogie monster globs. I am wondering, should I have followed the recipes directions instead of making this creative disaster? It was crap. This cake was now getting the official crap label. Those dark chocolate layers in there are actually burnt cake. That parmesan cheese around the edges are white chocolate swirls. *Sad face*

At this time my boyfriend had to interfere with some motivational talk all like “it looks goooood” and “the cake decorating craft takes practice, you’ll get better”

Well, boyfriend, if I had a child who was a boy and I was sexist, maybe it would be ok for his 2nd birthday with a previously purchased little blue Choo Choo train on top.

It tasted sensational.

No one received a gift or a photo.

  • **beginner baker tip:
  • – don’t tell anyone about your new hobby yet.
  • – my boyfriends mum recommends completely setting the icing overnight before decorating
  • – I believe in you and a better world with beautiful cakes for sharing.

Well, there’s a lot to learn from cooking fails. I think I will try it again someday and learn from my mistakes.

Please tell me about your wonderful cake fails and I wonder, did you still serve it up? How did it taste? Any tips to share that you learned from it?

Love,

Rosie

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